Relationship status, involved but not committed.

 

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Gone are the days of janam janam Ka pyar, undying love and soul mates till eternity.

Relationships today have become very frivolous, be it amongst families, friends or more. Recently a friend of mine (in today’s Facebook age, every one you know is a “friend” irreevant of everything else.)

So like I was saying, a friend of mine, whom I know from my yoga classes, an 18 yer old, pretty girl from a good family, recently got engaged.

No there’s nothing wrong in getting engaged, but then, she was seeing someone else,she was in a long distance relationship, which I found out was a relationship of great understanding, understanding that there would be no strings attached, no commitments.

She was with this guy who is settled outside India, so they used to meet up as and when circumstances allowed them, she used to go to a city which was convenient for him when he was in the country, and “meet up, catch up and a enjoy each other’s company”, whatever that means is upon your interpretation.

Throughout the period that they were together, maybe around a yer or so, both knew the minute they found someone more suitable more “right”, the other person would bolt faster than the speed of light.

And thats what happened, she met a righter Mr. Right, and decided to tie the knot. But how does she know he’s more right than the older Mr. Right?

In our urge to live better, to live luxuriously, somewhere we have left our emotions and feelings in the old suitcase. Even friendships these days is such a light hearted matter, you’re my friend if you say good things about me, compliment me, but if you show me the mirror, I’ll crack it.

Relationships are also equally fragile, we all know there are lots of fishes around, so if one dsnt suit you try some other. Divorces are so common these days because of the same reasons.

They say our lives are more stressful, more tensed, but why did this happen?
When we have the best technologies, best gaImagedgets machines to help us work more smoothly, easily, and more efficiently, why are we becoming like machines.

Who is eating away our emotions? Our feelings?
Read a nice quote some time back, all things that make us happy and are good for us are not things. But..

Ek Mein aur ekk Tu, with an extra K.

Ek Mein aur ek tu, no not you and me, but the movie, staring Imran Khan and Kareena Kapoor.

I know it’s been a long time since the movie released but ever since I saw the movie it’s been in my head. It was a new awakening, a new era in Hindi cinema, no not technologically (I’m no judge on that), but content wise and the social message it brought across was a good one. I hope it has the right impact too.

It finally murdered, or has started the slow killing or the age old “ek ladka aur ek Ladki kabhi dost nahi ho sakte”, a girl and a boy can never be JUST FRIENDS.
Yeah I know people like you and me were always aware of these things but in rural and even some parts of urban India, people are still under the influence of our conventional thinkings and mind set. Each parent worries how their daughter or son will be perceived by the society’s tough screening eyes.

Why go so far, even in our societies, we see people being labeled cause they share a house, a vehicle or maybe just spend some nice time together at a cafe with someone from the opposite sex, siddha siddha character dhilla ho jata hai! (they individuals character is completely assassinated)

The movies shows that just cause a girl and boy sleep on the same bed does not imply that they are sleeping with each other.
Just cause a guy likes a girl she does not have to tie a rakhi to him, nor does she need to shun him or avoid him, most boys get out of their infatuations or crushes and even if it’s love they can take rejections. Not all guys will turn rapists or murderers when rejected.

A guy and a girl can still be JUST friends, platonic relationships do exits.
Friends can call each other darlings and sweethearts and still not be in a physical relationship. It’s possible.
Just cause a girl hugs or kisses her guy friend he does not become her boyfriend and she does not become a slut!

Times have really changed. Today, a guy-guy , or even a girl-girl relationship is more suspicious than that of a ladka-ladki, (boy-girl).

Times have changed and we need to change things too. The age old trend of finishing off all love stories, the good the bad or the ugly, with a marriage, which are equally worse, has finally begun to end.

As we see in real life, very few love stories, or affairs end up in marriages and even lesser are happily ever after, it happens only in fairy tales and out Hindi movies. But finally a fresh breeze of air I felt.

Its been an unsaid rule that the leading couple has to be married off in the end, or killed like in Qayamat Se Qayamat tak, or Sathiya, but they for sure could not be left untied. Hence amongst all the drama, dialogues and dhishum dhishum, the end result was always “just married, happily forever.”

This trend was worse in cases of rape victims, if a female was raped also, the right to do was to force the bad man to marry her, and so she could be raped for the rest of her life without any consequences on the husband.
It boils my temper when I see such cases, what could be worse for the girl? You are rewarding him and instead giving her a death sentence.

Our movies are not just a source of entertainment, they are not just a mirror of our society, many a times, they are also reference points in mane places. Actors and actresses are considered Gods and temples have been created for them. The general public looks upon then and their practices on screen are like lessons to live for most of our rural public.

We have statutory warnings for smoking, violent scenes or even sexual content, but there is nothing telling the public that this is a movie, it’s fiction and it should not be followed in real life.

People look upon the society through movies and television shows now a days, best example is that of the saas-bahu relationship, it was never as strained as it is now, nor was it so notably a negative relationship, if you say something good or nice about your own mother in law or vice versa, it’s almost a crime!
But this was not there per-saas-bahu sagas, it’s only after all these series that the terms have become so tainted.

So all in all, I loved the efforts of the Ek Main Ek Tu ‘s team, kudos for putting up the urban youths point of view, for telling people not to judge someone on the sex of their friends, just be and let others also be.

But then having said all those nice things, they had to put in an extra K, to bring in the good luck through numerology to the title. Offhhh…

But still Cheers to a new bollywood!!!

Lessons in Life

In life we often fear to be misunderstood, we worry about how we will be perceived by others, these others could be people whom we care about, or don’t care about, but still they matter.
Recently I heard an anecdote; it is about a father and son, who are traveling with a pony, from one village to another.
When they began their journey, both of them were ridding together on the pony. A while later, some passer-bys commented how cruel they were, two healthy men ridding on one small pony, hearing this, the father got off the pony and started walking while he let his son ride on.
Then they came across some other travelers, seeing the son ridding alone on the pony and his father walking they commented on how the generation is shameless and all, hearing this, the son got down and made his father sit on the horse.
A little further down the route, someone called the father heartless and uncaring, who was himself ridding comfortably on the pony but making his son walk in the heat! Listening to this, the father also started walking with his son.
Now, seeing the two men walking with the pony by their sides, people started calling them foolish and stupid~ why walk when you can ride on it, they asked. And started laughing, not knowing that is where they had started with.
In life, we often want to do things that are not approved of by others, irrespective of the fact whether those same people matter to us or not in life. If they are important in our lives and love us truly, they will agree with our methods and thoughts, and incase they don’t, we should not let them bother or influence us, but we do, and by doing it, we hurt ourselves only.
 
I don’t know what is right what is wrong, but I think we should try and do what we want, how we want, as long as our actions and decisions don’t hurt others and make us happy it cant be wrong. Rest I don’t know.