Relationship status, involved but not committed.

 

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Gone are the days of janam janam Ka pyar, undying love and soul mates till eternity.

Relationships today have become very frivolous, be it amongst families, friends or more. Recently a friend of mine (in today’s Facebook age, every one you know is a “friend” irreevant of everything else.)

So like I was saying, a friend of mine, whom I know from my yoga classes, an 18 yer old, pretty girl from a good family, recently got engaged.

No there’s nothing wrong in getting engaged, but then, she was seeing someone else,she was in a long distance relationship, which I found out was a relationship of great understanding, understanding that there would be no strings attached, no commitments.

She was with this guy who is settled outside India, so they used to meet up as and when circumstances allowed them, she used to go to a city which was convenient for him when he was in the country, and “meet up, catch up and a enjoy each other’s company”, whatever that means is upon your interpretation.

Throughout the period that they were together, maybe around a yer or so, both knew the minute they found someone more suitable more “right”, the other person would bolt faster than the speed of light.

And thats what happened, she met a righter Mr. Right, and decided to tie the knot. But how does she know he’s more right than the older Mr. Right?

In our urge to live better, to live luxuriously, somewhere we have left our emotions and feelings in the old suitcase. Even friendships these days is such a light hearted matter, you’re my friend if you say good things about me, compliment me, but if you show me the mirror, I’ll crack it.

Relationships are also equally fragile, we all know there are lots of fishes around, so if one dsnt suit you try some other. Divorces are so common these days because of the same reasons.

They say our lives are more stressful, more tensed, but why did this happen?
When we have the best technologies, best gaImagedgets machines to help us work more smoothly, easily, and more efficiently, why are we becoming like machines.

Who is eating away our emotions? Our feelings?
Read a nice quote some time back, all things that make us happy and are good for us are not things. But..

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Holi Hai….

These days wishing holi by saying happy holi is no enough, you have to add, SAFE hol

Happy holi people, I know it’s happy time, colour time, but then what if you are not in the the mood to celebrate holi?

How do you feel good when you know these colours will harm you, these celebrations will injure your lungs, damage your skin and cause lots of destruction to the nature too.

ImageI wasn’t like this before but I guess some things come with age. As a teenager living in we played holi with the best of colours, t a specifically designated place, a plain ground away from the city, so that who all wants to play come there enjoy with like minded people and go home happy. People who don’t want to are not made to participate forcefully.

But after shifting to India, I was made a shooting target with water filled balloons, oh I meant coloured water, street children, (age range could vary for 5 year olds to 50 year olds). These so called kids would start practicing a month in advanced to perfect their shooting skills. Local cops and other authorities would laugh it off calling harmless mischievousness. But ask that to a girl or a lady who’s on her way to school, college with papers on her hand, or someone going for an interview, who’s clothes have been dirtied and compelly messed up.

At the time of writing this blog, I’m watching a news being telecast, about how some people have been severely injured due to the poor quality of colours being sold in the open markets. Access to good quality products is so difficult that most of the times, we are forced to buy these inferior colours by default.

It’s a common occurrence in Indian cities to be cheated under the name of herbal and pure. I used to buy herbal organic colour thinking that they were good and would not leave scars on my daughter’s sensitive skin, but everything I was mistaken and in for a rude shock. Till recently I decided its best to play only with water.

So for us, holi is no longer a festival of colours, just wet fun.

I know wasting water is an equally big crime in India where drinking water in so scarce, but then what to do, how can I not let me kid play and enjoy, I can tell her not to waste excess water, maybe limit it, everything in moderation works. So I guess this too shall do.

Teeth and footing days.

Starting this journey with WordPress is nothing like starting blogging all over again. It’s much more complicated. I can compare this feeling to how I felt when I got married and arrived in this new house, a new city, new people, new rituals and all.

I dint know where to go, what to do, what was right what was wrong, their routines their expectations and my role in all this. It looked chaotic, but had a well oiled system to it all. They all knew their roles their functions, and gradually even I found my place, similarly I hope to find my foothold here too.

Looking at the new interface, I don’t know what to do and what not. I don’t want to make ny mistakes, mainly caue I can’t call them my tooting mistakes any longer. Like I did when I started wit blogger. But now, Im expected to know, to be aware, but I’m not and soam tensed.

The whole look and concept of WordPress is very formal,serious as opposed to the of blogg, which is very causal, relaxed, or maybe that’s how it seems to me, maybe it had become familiar to me, like my parents house, no matter how rushed or out of place the place was I used to be at home, but at my in-laws a place, even though it’s more organised, I find it chaotic.

Not just me, most of the Indian girls, find their in-laws house, which she shares with other members of the family, not so homely, not so comfortable. Even after being married for more than a decade, it’s still her “Sasural”, her inlaws a house, never her own.

Hopefully in some time, more sooner than later, a balance would be strikes, and rhythm shall be maintained Rhythm to blog, to communicate, to develop and build new relationships new meaning to all things chaotic.

Life becomes easier if there are people to travel with, to talk to, help me make this journey of mine easier, more joyfull,come along lets do this together.

Time to say goodbye?

Well I’m hoping not, but for the time being am moving to WordPress, till I don’t get things sorted with googl. Have left lots of help mails at their desk too, so positively waiting. Hope don’t Get to comfortable with WordPress till then!Hope to see you all there too, poojashahdesai.wordpress.com, though most of you have suggested to move off to the promised paradise in blogosphere, I personally don’t like changes, so will wish to be connected with blogger too.Let’s see what the promised world has in store for me. This is life, it’s all destined, never did I think I’d have to leave my first blog and move to a new hemisphere all to gather. God bless and take care…it was great being here…see you at the new venue. poojashahdesai.wordpress.com

Hello WordPress, hello blogging, again

Hello to a new beginning of a journey I had started with blogger, at much ado abt nothing but due to some technical disabilities, I’m unable to create new posts and use my accounts.

By now I’m sure you have realised how technically handicap I am. So on the same ground please excuse me for any mistakes I may make in my initial days. I’m still trying to get a steady foothold, rather adjust my finger tips to this new chapter in my blogging phase.

I’ve heard lots of good things about WordPress, so am expecting lots of the from this place, but at the same time warn you, not too expect that much from me, like my blog title says, much ado about nothing, there is no rhyme or reason to it particularly, but at the same time it’s everything and anything type of a place.

This is my first post, am not sure if the same issues that I had with blogger will persist or not, so am now writing more.

Hello WordPress, hello blogging, again.

Tech help required

Coming back to the problems I’m facing in posting my blogs, as I’ve mentioned in my previous post, I thought it best to ask for help from you people,my co-bloggers.Well for starters, I was using a normal computer, but then one day all of a sudden I was unable to access all my google accounts. I’m able to open the google search sites, but not personal accounts, specifically gmail and blogger.I usually used to use my cell phone to read and comment on your blogs. But during the same time, somehow, my mobile tells me, that my password is in correct and I need to check it from a PC. On checking the accounts from a friends system, I found that it accepts my old password only, which my cell is rejecting.Now tired with my daily constant complaints, my husband got me a iPad, he had seem me fretting over all the various indiblogger competitons, but now comes the new problem. I don’t know how to edit word documents here. I alos dont kow why the page breaks are not working….so many things that I dont know. And now I find out, I can’t even link images to my posts. Tried unsuccessfully to link URLs and tags too. Teething day for sure, but am so tired of not being able to blog that I’ve finally come out seek help from anyone who can. People please leave your suggestions and share your experiences with me here.

Versatile or not, award it is.

I know it’s been a very long time, and no excuses for that too. But as most of us have been through this phase at some point or the other, where we want to come and blog but something or the other just keeps coming in the way.Before I left, I was bestowed upon an award by Bikramjit, now who doesn’t know Birkram Mann, he’s everywhere. This was my first award, and coming from Bikram it was more special because he is amongst my oldest and most regular follower, Thank you Bikramjit for all your wonderful comments and keeping up with me even when I’m so irregular. Well coming back to the Award it’s rules are very simple. First: I have to nominate 15 fellow bloggers and also inform them about the same. Secondly, I have to share 7 random (what random means here…I don’t know) things about myself. Lastly, of course, thank the blogger who nominated you.Like you see, I did the thanking part (more so than required) first! But still, thank you Bikram for nominating me for this award. Once again! 7 random things about me would be very difficult, like there are so many things that I don’t know which 7 will do the least harm.1. So the first thing that comes to my mind is, that though most of the people who come across me find me very confident and in control types, I’m not, “deekhavoo pe mat jao…apni akal lagao”. 2. Though at the same time, there are some who think I’m arrogant and don’t talk to me, but if you don’t talk to me how will you know me? 3. I need constant encouragement and motivation, *hint hint, leave more and more appreciative comments after you read my posts!*. Perfectly described by Linda Goodman, “She seems to be more even-tempered and emotionally steady than she actually is. Her manner may convince you that she’s as firm as a rock and nothing can ruffle her calm surface. The truth is that she’s subject to many moods”.4. I completely believe in destiny and luck, or like how fate would have it, though I don’t believe in God that much. I think God has been created to instill the feelings of hope and fear in humans. From what little I have seen in my life, as well in others, I have come to realize good things can happen to bad and good people equally, and vice-versa. It’s just all destined.5. I make new friends very easily, but also stick to the old ones for a long time…yeah am clingy that ways. Friends for once friends forever. 6. I’m very scared of pets, even parrots! I don’t know, can’t come close to anything with fur blankets included!7. Have a very bad memory already! Can hardly remember and recollect faces or names! Gets me in lots of embarrassing situations very often. I’ve already forgot what and why I started off this! Now comes the tagging part!!! Yeeahh….and a personal request, please write 1 or 2 things about you that would show us your personal side too.In a random order of course.Sunil, I know he shares lots of his technological experiences, especially everything and anything with an i, does not talk much about him, so maybe this award can act like a catalyst and make his write about himself! A recent follower Swapna, who writes about parenting and her experiences, is indeed very versatile. http://www.indianma.com/Sunita’s blog, Sukupedia, I see, I feel, I say. As simple as it is, her blogs much more..http://sunitakurup.blogspot.in/Farila or is it Farida, I’m a bit confused, has lots of wonderful things to share with us, especially since she’s faced so many upheavals in life herself. chaptersfrommylife.blogspot.in/When I first went on DeEpAK KaRtHiK (420)I was not expecting much, but then I was in for a surprise. http://deepakkarthikspeaks.blogspot.in/, more because of the 420 that follows his name, I want to know if it is meant for people like me?Sujatha Sathya has Conversations, http://sujathasathya.blogspot.in/, about life, relationships and love, but the way she says it I always feel she’s talking about me. Priya http://very-me-priya.blogspot.in/ at very me, writes about her life and also about things happening around her.Rahul says he’s instable but if this is instability, I wish I had some too. Read more at Monumental Instability. http://randomrahul.blogspot.in/ Raj, love the way he hits the funny bone with all his sarcastic and humorous posts. http://fu-ck-lo-ve.blogspot.in/.Pramodji as he is fondly referred to on the blogosphere has lots to share on the workings of a marriage. http://marriagebook.in/ even though his other blog about various other things is more popular, I personally prefer this on.Sensitive heart, as I’ve got to know her, writes about lots of things, from movie reviews to photography, she’s covered it all, but lately she’s been missing from the blogging world, here’s hoping this tag shall act like a catalyst and bring her back. She was also amongst the first bloggers whom I had interacted with. http://myworldmyperception.blogspot.in/Raksha Bhatt, when I went to her blog and read her intro about herself, I wanted to read more. Here’s what she had to say, Flying through the seasons of life with me, myself and the world…A little of this and a little of that and all of everything! A Doctor by instinct, a Bookworm by desire… I am what I was…I am what I can be. http://ink-and-feathers.blogspot.in/Mukta a relatively new blogger has tons of yummy recipes at her blog, I think it really tough to keep up a cookery blog, which she is doing marvelously. http://bake-a-mania.blogspot.in/ though by tagging her I would like to know more about her as an individual too.Poems don’t interest me much, more so because they use too many unnecessary words most of the times, but Ritika Patel is an exception. http://delectableflavors.blogspot.in/Another blog that I have recently started following is http://viveksheel-blog.blogspot.in/. Vivek Sheel, a private blog till now is a treasure trove, especially for morning SMSes.There are lots more blogs which I would have loved to have tagged, but then there are some whom I think do not accept these so called “AWARDS”, and some who I feel are way above their tagging days. But then all said and done, I think we all (ME INCLUDED) are doing a marvelous job indeed.Friends, due to some serious (for a complete tech-novice for me), technical difficulties, a very long story, fit to be my next blog…I am unable to link the image to this post, if there’s anyone who can help me please let me know. How do I add an image on this post from my tablet. The choose file option is not valid here… And I also tried to link the image to it’s web URL too. But that too dint work. And for the same reasons, please excuse all my formatting errors too…along with that, please xcuse any other errors too ;).Pleas let me know why the formatting thing is not working…while I’m typing here, it shows me proper spacing and line breaks, but when I preview it shows me no spacing no line or para breaks. Desperately help required.I’m just too desperate to post this so here it is. Please bear with me and my ignorance!!

For better or for worse, Happy New Year

I know its Christmas time and the air around is filled with lots of festivities and joy, but it also translates into being busy for a stay at home mom, with my daughter having her holidays, my blog has been pushed to take a back seat. 

But heres wishing that all my readers and fellow bloggers had a very merry and cheerful  Christmas and wishing for a new year that comes with loads of love, luck, happiness and more of good things for all of you. (please leave your wishes too…need them lots and lots!) May it being with it the gifts of joy, goodness, passion, humanity and empathy for all of us. 


Though we all know about the prophecies related to year 2012, we shall all welcome the year with grand celebrations as always, that is what HOPE is all about, such is life. LIVE ON.

The End of the Mayan Calendar is scheduled for December 21, 2012 (give or take a year). The possibilities of what this “end” might mean is an increasingly hot topic on the Internet, in conferences, printed articles, and in discussions all over the globe.  This is because it just might be an incredibly important moment in history — e.g., the end of history!

For more information on the year 2012 and 2012 prophecies read this article: 2012 Prophecies This powerful article explains everything about the year 2012 and how it relates to the Mayan Calendar. It explains various 2012 prophecies and the significance of the year 2012.


You may also enjoy the article “2012 Problem” by Ralph Miller. It is more of a shamanic view of the year 2012 and the 2012 prophecies. It combines the ancient wisdom of the sacred plant “ayahuasca”. You can read this fascinating article on the year 2012 here: 2012 Problem

I also read here ( It says, Every significant Internet provider around the globe is currently in talks with access and content providers to transform the internet into a television-like medium: no more freedom, you pay for a small commercial package of sites you can visit and you’ll have to pay for seperate subscriptions for every site that’s not in the package.) now this worries me. But looking at the blog, I would rather like to believe that the author has made such remarks to garner more publicity for himself than anything else. Still got my fingers crossed.




How can we forget when how we welcomed the year 2000, even then  the world was going to come to an end, gadgets, phones, machines were not meant to work in the 2000 format, knowing all this we partied harder, so for better or for worse, Happy New Year! 



Destined to…live

With many crusaded dreams,
Painfulcherished moments
Cruellycrushed creatures,
Live life toyour fullest
We are oftentold.
Close my eyessee stars,
Even with openeyes, see stars,
Darkness makesthem black,
Man makes themblue.
How does onelive, love or forgive
What never iswhat you want
You get onlywhat you deserve
What you aredestined, fated
But who knows,who decides?
Child likepleasures,
Man likepassion
Woman likemisery
No you don’tknow it,
No you don’tcare.
That’s how Ishall keep.
That’s how I shall try to
Live.

Compliments

My days’ started off wonderfully.I got the 2nd most beautiful comment in my life!  (But bothof them haven’t come from my husband, or boyfriends for that matter.)
I know I never write about personal stuff much, but don’t know today amtyping this, will find out only later if I post this or not.
Coming back to the compliment I received,ohh, the only thing that could beat it was if it had come from my husband, orjust any other guy instead of this sweet girl.
She saw me at the gym, lazilyworking out, I am THE laziest member ofthe class, even the instructor says so, but I’m also the only one who’s beenattending his class from the start, so I guess it evens it out.
After the class, we met in thechanging room, she started hesitantly, “May I say something to you?”, and I waslike, OH no, here it comes, what could itbe, my shoes my top or my pants, or even worse, is there a tag stuck behind myback…gosh!
“Ya, sure tell me” with a small smile that took more force thanthose push-ups!
“Your face…”
My hands instantly go to my face, what?
She continues, “Your face is veryattractive, your features are very nice…”
I relax and even blush, “Oh thank you, that very sweet of you.” I can’ttake criticism but I don’t even like getting compliments, it embarrasses me. I know they mean well and good, but still I happento look at the person suspiciously.
“When I saw you I felt like I wantedto keep looking at you, could not take my eyes off your face”, she adds.
Well now I was almost blushing,has this person been a guy I would have swelled, but as she was a female, mademe wonder, think and even suspect her motives, see I told you na I get suspicious.
But later when we spoke and I figuredout she was not a lesbian and meant no evil, I felt swell! It made me so happy that I hope I dint gain some inches with theswelling!
Giving compliments is a meantask, especially to a stranger, so kudos to this girl, whose name also I dintget. But even otherwise, one needs to put aside his/her ego and to give a compliment,more so if it to someone of the same sex.
But there are some compliments whichsomehow sound like insults. Any accoladeor praise, even though meant in good spirits, that leave you confused is a badcompliment. Theystrike you like, no she dint just say that, not in front of an audience!
 “You are looking nice today”, don’t I look nice on other days?
“Your hair’s looking good, wheredid you get it cut?”, are you saying myhair’s not nice, but only coz of the cut it’s looking good?
“Are those your real eyes?”, no I’m wearing artificial eyes!
 “That dress makes you look thin”, Am I fat?
“Wow, is that a natural tan?”, yes I was born dark, nothings fair.
“You havea very photogenic face”, does this mean Idon’t look good in real?
Another of these confusedcompliments that most of us receive while growing up is, you can do better. Why isn’t what I did good enough? Why youwant better?
Your daughter in law is very good”,identified and accepted as a perfectbali-ka-bakra (sacrificial goat) cause “good daughter-in-law” here means, dumb,as in both stupid and mute.
But the most dreaded complimentthat no woman wants to here has to be, “congratulations, your baby bump is socute”, when you are not even pregnant! I’vestopped congratulating people till I’m 100%sure that she’s expecting.
Another female oriented compliment-cum-insulthas to be, “you drive pretty well for a woman”, and I don’t have any words for this one.
Once a very long time back, a friendof mine had tagged me as “a tit-for-tat person”, later she tried very hard tojustify saying she meant it in a good way, but I was not. It was for this sameperson that I had got into a fight with my seniors at work, and she was saying thisto the same senior “That’s how Pooja is, let it go”
I remember, I colleague of mine gotengaged to this jerk of a guy from the same office, and when I found out, thebest I could say was “good for you”,she not knowing that it was not a nice compliment took it as a congratulatoryremark.
I know it tough to get over someof these compliments, but the best possible way to deal with them, as per my experienceis, to ignore them. Say a thank you, with a smile and let it go, as innocentlyas it was said, take it like it was not meant to be that way. Maybe the speakeris not as fluent with her language skills as you are. Most of the times, theperson’s intentions are innocent, but even it not, thank you works best, as it’slike a missed shot for the person. It will annoy the person when you don’t flareup or get hurt as per his/her expectation.
Have a good day! And make sure yourcompliment are just what they ought to be.